I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Randomize
