I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
