I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
