Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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