And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
