the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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