why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
