The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
it was like eating out sand paper
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Randomize
