Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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