Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
