On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
What drink are we having for lunch?
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
