I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
