I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
