38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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