I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
