you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
