i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
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