If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
