Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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