Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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