I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Randomize
