I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I think I am morally bankrupt
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Randomize
