Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
