I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize