Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
my liver is dry heaving
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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