I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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