she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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