Midget sex pt 2 tonight
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Blood and glitter go together right?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
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