Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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