wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
