i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
