You made me cry and you don't even care
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
