He is an equal opportunity slut.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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