I hope mine doesn't look like that
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
