so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
