Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
