Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I understand Curling. That high.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize