we were pretty classy up until the second keg
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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