I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
