Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
