i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
