Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
well you can't waste a boner
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
