she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
