That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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