I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
