with your own penis?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Hippo gnu deer
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
