Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
