Just mADE A PArabola og urine
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
