my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
