i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
i think im in europe. pls send help
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
